24 November 2009

Is she really gone?

I can't seem to erase Annabel's pill schedule.

It's still on the little white dry ease board on the fridge.

On Sunday when I was cleaning the kitchen I just couldn't keep looking at Annabel's Bowl sitting empty on our dining table. So away it went into the storage room.

But I just can't seem to bring myself to erase her schedule. I tried to do it yesterday and ended up in a heap of sobbing tears leaning against the fridge. I finally just had to walk away to do something else.

It's like somehow if I do it...

I'll be admitting that she's really and truly gone.

I have to pick up Annabel's ashes today on my way home from work.

Maybe afterwards...

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