"Outing" myself...

I'm flipping through the channels last evening after a long day at work.

Chris is at his computer.

I hear a chuckle from across the room.

"What are you laughing at?" I ask.

"I'm reading your post - 'The yuck factor...' I like it," he replies and returns to reading.

"Really? You like it?"

"Yeah. It's REALLY good."

I can feel myself blushing and glowing at my husband's praise.

Chris is a great writer. He's fast, talented, funny, and I truly admire all of his work...So when he reads my work and compliments it...well, let's just say that I turn into a great big dork with a ridiculously huge goofy grin on my face.

So I wake up this morning still basking the glow of his compliment, feeling the urge to write and then I realize...

Crap.

What am I going to write about?

No great adoption revelations yesterday. And no new news on the adoption front either since we just mailed off the last of the stuff (and may I add that it feels really weird to come home each day and NOT have adoption stuff to do...)

So I find myself writing not about adoption, but instead about my writing.

How stupid is that?

Vanity, thy name is Jennifer!

But it's true.

I've kept a journal for more than half my life. Writing, writing, writing all of the time my deepest, darkest thoughts and my not-so-dark thoughts as well. And then along comes the Internet and my discovery of the world of blogging and suddenly...

My inner writer wants OUT.

Oh no.

Oh dear.

No more keeping my thoughts and incredibly keen and clever insights all to myself.

My inner writer wants someone ELSE to read my words! Wants to affect others - to make them laugh, cry, think, reflect, react, and - dare I even admit it? - to have others say about me, "Wow, she's a great writer."

The ultimate compliment.

"She's a great writer."

It almost makes me swoon to think about getting that kind of praise.

The other day one of my colleagues said in passing, "I just love the stuff you write. I keep wanting to comment, but I don't know how. I'll have to figure that out."

Her compliment keeps me glowing for the rest of the day.

And, of course, the inner writer in me shrieks, "Go show her how to leave a comment so she can compliment your work right on the blog!"

Awful.

Just awful.

When did I become this crazy vain person?

This writer?

Have I always been this way???

Maybe.

So here I am in my little corner of the blogging world. I write about whatever I want, whenever I want. There is a great amount of satisfaction in seeing my words posted online for the world to see and an even greater amount of joy in the process of creating each post for folks to read if they choose.

I even have a few followers (Thank you! Oh, thank you!)

Am I a great writer? I don't know (and, no, I'm not looking for compliments - seriously...), but I do know that I love writing.

So, the next time that Chris compliments my work...well, as much as I'll try not to do it, I just know that I will once again turn into a huge grinning blob of happiness.

Awful.

Just awful

Feel free to leave a compliment - er - I mean - a comment...

Separate...but equal?

It occurred to me today that Chris and I are writing separate blogs about our experiences as adoptive parents-to-be.

As we get further into this process, I've been doing more searching online for the blogs of other adoptive parents. I notice that many of these blogs are joint blogs contributed to by both spouses. It made me wonder about Chris and I having separate blogs...

Is this weird?

Maybe.

Then again...maybe not.

One of the things that I've always truly appreciated about Chris is the way that he encourages me to pursue my creative interests and endeavors independent of him. He's the one who bought me a drafting table so that I would have a place to make art. And when I'm there making my collages for hours at a time he never ever grumbles that I'm not spending time with him. Instead, he is genuinely happy that I am engaging in an activity that brings me joy.

Meanwhile, it also gives him a great excuse to camp out at his computer to do his own creative writing...checking in on me from time to time to view my creations.

"Whatcha makin?" he'll ask me with a grin. I'll show him my latest and greatest and will usually receive a "Cool!!" or "That's really interesting" in response.

Indeed, it was Chris who encouraged me to create and maintain a blog because he knows how I love to journal/write and thought it would be a good experience for me.

Likewise, Chris is a writer and I am most happy when I know that he's working on his novel or some other piece of creative writing.

So it seemed perfectly natural for him to create and maintain his own adoption experience blog (in addition to his OTHER blog...)

Hmmm...it would appear that I have answered my own question.

One slight drawback to two writers each having their own blogs is that we sometimes tend to get a little overly involved in our respective writing projects...both of us tap-tap-tapping away separately...and before we know it the evening has passed us by and its time to feed the Wretched Beasties (our demanding felines) and then head off to bed.

So, with that in mind I am signing off to spend a computer-free, blog-free evening with Chris who is on his way home from work.